Saturday, October 22, 2005
I'll Sell This Bugger Right Now!

Blah, Blah, Blah. Yeah, this week is truly exciting. Well the tiff with my roommate was a big highlight. My sleep is still totally wonky, and my mood is swinging all over the dang place. I have had some intense thoughts while experiencing the high, sleep deprived moments though. As in, I'm going to move. Well, obviously, I shall be in another month before that wedding takes place. I've decided that I'm REALLY out of state...after I finish my program. I need a big change to really shake me up. I seriously need to get away from my family...I need more cultural stimulation...I need to find more people my age that I can have a decent conversation with. It just isn't happening here. If I can find a program similar to the one I'm starting next year in another state (which I'm still searching for!), the move will take place then. If not, add a year to it. Now, I love the midwest...possibly Minneapolis or Chicago....east coast also sounds interesting...Denver area also was cool the last time I visited. I still have a lot of time to think about it, but I surely am going to take that leap. And this is the time....before I get attached to anyone too seriously, no kids, not in love with my job.

When I do sleep, I've been having dang good dreams that I actually can remember and I hate when my body makes me wake. Last night, I had a nice one...working in the medical profession (not sure if I was a doc or what!) own place somewhere new (my parents even called me in the dream saying they missed me--which was quite a shocker)...good hair (when does that ever happen for me)...and had a big ol' makeout session with a guy that I've never met so far in life. Oh yeah, and he adored me and could sing! Yes, I still would like to hold out for a man with a voice...Paul attempted and royally sucked but he thought he was the greatest...recycled man of the moment is a trombone player but I don't think he can carry much of a tune vocally. I so wish I could have Part 2 tonight!

Finally, swiping this from Wendy...

My blog is worth $28,791.54.
How much is your blog worth?


Sunday, October 16, 2005
Insert Witty Title Here

Band Bus Tragedy

Sigh. This story just really hit home for me. Poor guys...going home to celebrate a third place victory and getting hit by a semi. I've had the pleasure (or displeasure?) of riding the chartered bus for band or other school activities a zillion times over the years. Must say, I've had nightmares about something just like this occasionally. The worst I've ever experienced is a flat tire, though. My thoughts are with those students and their families.

Well anyways, I've had a nice little weekend :) My little visitor finally chilled out and my human visitor was a nice diversion from the doledrums. All signs point to a repeat visit again, and that's all I'm going to say at this point! No need for me to jinx anything! Only a few hours gone, and the blues are back hitting me full blast. It's time to finally do something about that.

Step One: Heading out for a walk right now!

I'll conquer everything else after that :)

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

WARNING: Men may not want to read the first part of this post :)

Arrrrgh, Aunt Flo is back with a vengeance! I can't sleep any darn longer or I'll soak through another outfit. For the past several hours, I've had to change my coverage every hour if not sooner. Boy, nothing beats the feeling that I'm peeing in my pants and it's not coming from that hole (there's the TMI for you!) My tummy wants to explode and now I'm feeling quite woozy...most likely due to the blood loss. Time for more bananas :) Blah, I hate dealing with this! These birth control pills just aren't doing the trick with my cycle. My hormones must be seriously out of whack or this is just a bad side effect from medication...but man, I'm sick of compounded problems!

Good news front: I get a visitor this weekend (of the male species!) I was invited to go up to his place last weekend but couldn't due to car issues and other plans (that didn't end up happening and I'm still very pissed about.) We've been chatting by phone and the net, but he hasn't seen me in person for about six years! Yikes! I am doing my best not to freak out about what will happen. I'm not worried about my size since the scale says I'm smaller than when we were together...I'm just curious about his intentions. After the first day of chatting again, we have teased each other about some "not just friendslike" subjects (and I need to thank the wise Aussie dude I'll never meet for getting me to open up about that stuff and enduring some nicknames!) I've picked up some vibes that lead me to think that maybe he "like-likes me" (Ha! How middle school!) again. But, he isn't blatantly obvious about it...

How do I feel about this possibility? If you asked me at beginning of August, I'd have said, "Are you nuts? I won't be ready for years!" And with a guy who has already rode the Gigglepuss Coaster? Sounds like a horrible idea, right? Well, what can I say? He's dethawing my frozen heart. He makes me laugh so much and never makes me feel like a shit. In fact, he was always a good guy...I really took him for granted back then. So, I'm really anxious about what might happen...nervous about bringing up how I'm starting to really feel....worried that I'm misreading his signals.... OOOOOOHHHH, I'M SO SCREWED!!

Friday, October 07, 2005
The Pit Redux!

Feeling like updating is a step in the right direction!!

Oy, I am pooped!!! I have now half of my room clean after having to search for my camera battery charger. Cleaning doesn't suck so much after you get in a groove. My sister, who doesn't do anything for anybody unless she gets something beneficial, called me at 5 am to ask for it! Now, when I get a call at that time in the morning, I figure it's an emergency. Oh noooooooo, of course not! Yesterday, I let her borrow my camera so she could take pictures of her play, and of course, she wore out the darn thing.

As it always goes, the battery charger magically appears in the very last possible area of my room. I found it after locating a bunch of things I forgot about or had accounted at being gone for good. Items include:
  • A walkie-talkie
  • The dress shoes I couldn't find for my Orlando trip
  • A name badge from a place I hadn't worked in years
  • An old set of birth control pills
  • A sweatshirt from my last athletic event
  • Two pairs of blue jeans I loved but now are too big!
  • Clarinet reeds
If only I could find my second set of house keys (since my first ones have now decided to vanish) and my brain, I'd be ready to conquer the world!

Tuesday, October 04, 2005
Wedding Envy??

Well, I'm still working on getting my head back in the right place. No, I haven't set up an appointment yet, but I will as soon as I'm back to working which should be this week! I must say, this weight loss does help my mood...the pounds keep slipping off somehow.

Anyways, I need to get out of the house more often in order to avoid wedding chat! I am about to seriously gag :) Who knew planning was so time-consuming? Well, I suppose the three-month time frame my roommate is facing really is tough. She'll be married and she won't even have known the man for a year yet! I guess when you know, you know! She even has changed the ringer on her cell phone to a wedding-themed one. I'm sure you all can guess it! The phone rings quite a bit, so I'm a bit tired of the song.

When the subject isn't the wedding, it goes to family planning! One day, she had a random thought and called her future hubby to share "Gosh, we could start right away with baby making since my sister-in-law wants to start a daycare!" Oy!! Whenever I get married, I'd like to adjust to married life first for maybe a year before I start trying to pop one out. Well that answer could change if I don't find the right man until I'm 39.5 years old :)

Would all this frustrate me so much if I was in lovey-dovey bliss? Oh, heck yeah! I'm uually pretty accomodating, but man, is there anything else to talk about besides the big day? Like nail polish colors, best TV shows of the season, or even the Supreme Court justice nominee? Gosh, I could go on for quite a bit about the last two :) One of my guy friends said, "We'll just get engaged and then you talking incessantly about it may give her the hint!" Ha! Of course, this is a joke (key point for family members still reading! Grrrrrrr!) but it probably would work. Now all of you bloggers getting married and having babies, I enjoy reading your stories! I devour all your words and save some in my memory files for future reference. It's just my roommate chat that drives me insane.

I just need to keep repeating...Only THREE more months! SERENITY NOW!!